You're Bald...

You're Bald...
Subject Classification	Bald-Is-Awesome!
E-Boxes	6
Attack Type	BLACK (1 - 2)
Risk Level	ZAYIN
This Abnormality is Capable of Employee Alteration
Good Mood Range	4 - 6
Norm Mood Range	2 - 3
Bad Mood Range	0 - 1
Qliphoth Counter	X
Probabilities

"You turn on your electric hair clipper..."
- You're Bald

You're Bald... (Bald-Is-Awesome!) is an Abnormality taking the form of a white orb with the Korean letter '머'/meo (as in, 대머리/'daemeoli', the Korean word for "bald") in its center, with the upper half of the orb being covered in black, which changes after its ability is used.

Ability

Its ability will trigger when a non-bald employee works with the Abnormality. At the end of the work, a flashing light will appear on the employee's head, making them bald. You're Bald will change its appearance, the black on its top half receding like thinning hair, and start to move a bit more. If another non-bald employee enters its containment room and finishes a work, the same flashing light will now appear on the heads of every agent and clerk in the employee's department, making them all bald. You're Bald will now be completely white. If a third non-bald employee finishes a work with You're Bald, the screen flashes bright white, making every agent and clerk in the facility bald. After this, or at the end of a day, the Abnormality returns to its initial appearance.

Regardless of whether they were bald upon hiring or became bald as a result of this Abnormality's ability, bald employees have the maximum Success Rate (95%) when working on You're Bald. There are no added effects other than the change in appearance to employees.

Origin

Although the details are a bit unclear, You're Bald is said to have appeared in the facility after an employee, who had an 'amazing dream' where all people became bald, had an "accident" involving the Singing Machine.

Details

You're Bald has no preferred work type, only caring whether the employee performing the work is bald or not. For non-bald employees, all work types have a 'Very Low' success rate; for bald employees, all work types have the maximum possible success rate.

Like all Abnormalities, its energy output is determined by the number of PE Boxes (Positive Enkephalin boxes) at the end of the interaction.

You're Bald's emotional state is divided into 3 sections: Bad, Normal, and Good. Completing 0-1 E Boxes will cause it to feel Distressed, completing 2-3 will cause it to feel Normal, and 4-6 will make it Happy. Its usual cooldown timer after a task is around 10 seconds.

Unlockable Information/Upgrades

Basic Information (Cost: 4 PE Boxes)

Unlocks and shows the name of the Abnormality, subject classification, Risk Level ( ZAYIN), portrait, Damage Type ( Black 1-2), the amount of E-Boxes (6), and its emotional states.

Instinct/Insight/Attachment/Repression Work Favor (Cost: 2 PE Boxes)

Unlocks the percentage level list to the respective work.

Managerial Works 1/2/3 (Cost: 2 PE Boxes)

• "Managerial Tips 1"
  • "You still seem to be keeping your silky hair… You’ve been struck by the Bald-is-awesome! beam."

• "Managerial Tips 2"
  • "If you don’t work now, every employee, including you, will lose all their hair and become bald within a month."
• "Managerial Tips 3"
  • "It’s not too late. 30... 29... 28..."

Escape Information (Cost: 4 PE Boxes)

Information if the Abnormality can escape or not: "Non Escaped Object"

Work	Level 1 Chance	Level 2 Chance	Level 3 Chance	Level 4 Chance	Level 5 Chance
	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)
	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)
	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)
	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)	"Very Low" (0%)

Observation Level

Level 1 (1 Section unlocked): Speed Rate +5

Level 2 (2 Sections unlocked): Success Rate +5%

Level 3 (3 Sections unlocked): Speed Rate +5

Unlocks the E.G.O. Gift 'Tough'.

Level 4 (All details unlocked): Success Rate +5%

Unlocks the E.G.O. Weapon and Suit 'Tough'.

E.G.O. Equipment

• Weapon
• Suit
• Gift

E.G.O. Weapon Tough

Tough
Grade:	Cost:	Max Amount:	Damage:	Attack Speed:	Range:	Observation Level:
TETH	15	3	White 2-4	Very Fast	Long	4
Requirements: Bald Agent

Special Information
Details	Special Ability
"A glock reminiscent of a certain detective who fought evil for 25 years, losing hair as time went by. Only those who maintain a clean “hairstyle” with no impurities on their head will be deemed worthy of equipping this weapon. Perhaps it could even shoot down a helicopter, if used well."	"Only equippable by bald employees or those who have developed alopecia areata"
Notes

E.G.O. Suit Tough

Tough
Grade:	Cost:	Max Amount:	RED Defense:	WHITE Defense:	BLACK Defense:	PALE Defense:
ZAYIN	10	5	1.0 Normal	1.0 Normal	0.8 Endured	2.0 Vulnerable
Observation Level: 4		Requirements: Bald Agent

Special Information
Details	Special Ability
"A leather jacket with an unusually luxurious figure. Only those who maintain a clean “hairstyle” with no impurities on their head will be deemed worthy of equipping this suit. Anyone who wears this jacket is reminiscent of a certain detective who preferred fists over guns."	"Only equippable by bald employees or those who have developed alopecia areata"
Notes

E.G.O. Gift Tough

	Tough (Eye)
	Effects: Movement Speed +2, Attack Speed +2

Drop Chance: 5% Observation Level: 3

Story

You're Bald's encyclopedia portrait

• "Warning: You have been hit by the baldy-bald psychological attack. If a non-bald person reads this, they’ll be granted the privilege to go bald at an extremely rapid pace. If one wants to stop this from happening, they must be assigned to work on this Abnormality. In addition, if you find 10 or more strands of hair on your pillow in the morning, it is recommended to peruse this encyclopedia article at least three times."

• "Bill: I had an amazing dream today!
• Brian: What, did you win the lottery or something? 
• Bill: When I got to work, everyone here was bald! Everyone including you! Maybe even people outside of this corporation! 
• Brian: Umm… I think you’ve been pretty stressed lately. Why don’t you go take counseling? 
• Employee Bill suffered an unfortunate accident with Singing Machine that day. Right after the incident, Abnormality Bald-is-awesome! appeared in the facility. We all cherish the memories of Bald Bill."

• "If one comes in contact with the Abnormality, they will talk or write about the positive aspects of baldness for about an hour, and ultimately make themselves go bald.
• If you become bald, you can save time because you don’t have to wash and dry your hair anymore, allowing you to be richer than others.
• No adverse reactions will happen if a bald employee is assigned to work with the Abnormality.
• The bald don’t have to worry about hair loss.
• If a non-bald employee is assigned, they will shave off their own hair.
• Bald people can even reflect light off their head and blind their opponents like a solar flare!
• This Abnormality’s goal is to make every single human on Earth bald.
• We won’t need light bulbs in our facility if there are more bald employees, because light reflects off their heads. This will allow us to save a tremendous amount of our budget.
• If a non-bald employee is sent to work with the Abnormality, it’ll produce less energy. 
• Did you know that every single noble in Europe during the Middle Ages was bald? They’d change their wig everyday!"

• "We’ve just added some new rules to the company code of conduct:
• + If you ever spot a XXX mocking their coworker with alopecia areata, they will be labeled as a hirsute, and will be banned from using the lounge for an indefinite period.
• They will also be forbidden from joining the company’s debate club “Questioners of the absence of bald Barbies”, the gourmet meetup “Octopi over Squid”, and the environmental protection group “Save the Bald Eagles”. (These regulations will be lifted as soon as the rulebreaker’s hair strand count goes below 1.)
• Lastly, I dedicate this article to employee T.H. who is quietly taking balding medicine next to me right now."

Flavour Text

• "<name> is starting to feel that hair is just a burden."
• "<name> is beginning to think that having a tattoo on a bald head would be super cool."
• "<name> is taking off their wig because they feel proud of their partial balding."
• "You can look just like Bruce Willis if you’re bald!"
• "Somehow, bald people always look professional no matter what they’re doing!"
• "If you’re bald, you never have to worry about clogging the drain!"
• "So you still have your silky hair?"

Trivia

• You're Bald could be considered a 'Joke' Abnormality, due to its release date (April 3) being near April Fools' Day.
• You're Bald is the only Abnormality without a proper Subject Number.
• The letter on You're Bald is '머', which means '대머리', 'bald' written in Korean.
• You're Bald is the only ZAYIN Abnormality that deals Black damage.
• You're Bald produces the least amount of E-Boxes, at only 6.
• You're Bald's E.G.O. is a reference to Luke Hobbs from the Fast & Furious franchise.
• The celebrity mentioned through Work flavour text with You're Bald is Bruce Willis, which is a reference to the American actor Bruce Willis.
• The text shown for You're Bald... on the extraction screen comes from its Legacy version's Final Observation, rather than its story like most other Abnormalities.

Gallery

You're Bald's containment

You're Bald's second form

You're Bald's third form

You're Bald Details unlocked

Notice About the Article "You're Bald...":
Are you looking for the old version of this page: You're Bald... (Legacy)
"You're Bald..." is using information from the newest version of the game (v1.0.2.13f). The information here is from a newer version of the game including the most recent gameplay changes.